Brute Reason

A collection of thoughts about psychology, social justice, and anything else I give a shit about.

Topics: feminism / psychology / lgbtq / sex / politics / abortion / health / mental illness / language / depression / sexism / sexual assault / fashion / racism / education / social justice

my actual writing, if you're curious

I’ve encountered people constantly assuming sex is good and that having sex is just something you do in healthy relationships. This creates a situation where hating sex is a character flaw caused by those terrible sex-negative tropes society presses on you, and obviously only Bad People don’t consent to sex.

That’s rape culture. This is what environments that assume sex is unambiguously a good thing do. Saying, “It’s consensual sex that’s good” doesn’t actually fix the problem. It just creates a situation where you must be consenting to sex, because if you aren’t, you’re not having enough sex and then you’re “sex-negative”.

See, it only fixes a problem where you’re like, “Well I don’t really want to do this right now”. It does not do anything at all to help people who find sex painful. It does nothing at all to help a person who doesn’t want sex, but thinks they do because it’s been so heavily normativized they have to have sex, and have to have it in this specific way. All the, “But make sure it’s consensual!” thing does is tells the person, “Well maybe if you don’t want sex this time it’s okay, but remember you still must be having it some of the time!”

See, to actually fight rape culture you need to say “Sex is always optional. You are never obligated to have sex.” You must always be concerned with consent, and that means you must accept that the answer may very well always be no, despite the fact there’s this belief sex is the greatest thing ever.

And if someone never wants sex, then sex can’t really be a good thing to them, because it’s always unwanted.

Sex Positivity is Rape Culture in Disguise (via youlittlearsonist)

Really like this. We need to find ways of transforming real sex positivity to promote choice in sex, not uncritically promote sex itself. (via swankivy)

This. All of this. (via elementalsight)


This is something that I really believe in and I dislike that “sex-positive” has such bad history and current problems as well. When I first learned about it, I really thought about it was focused on what this passage is describing, that it is okay to want sex and it is okay to not want sex. Hopefully, my followers know I am all for whatever a person is comfortable with.

(via foryoursexualinformation)

(Source: sissypunks, via foryoursexualinformation)

  1. everythinghelpful reblogged this from natnovna
  2. aantifreeze reblogged this from 148km
  3. jenniferleawho reblogged this from atouchofdestiny
  4. miss-ribbit reblogged this from atouchofdestiny
  5. atouchofdestiny reblogged this from fuckyeahsexeducation
  6. quoughts reblogged this from yesysabella
  7. eveamedeus reblogged this from a-67-chevy-impala
  8. fairypath reblogged this from bruhvengers
  9. a-67-chevy-impala reblogged this from invernom
  10. invernom reblogged this from missolivialouise
  11. is-your-klondikebar-a-dildo reblogged this from 1bunnyboy3
  12. vicky-de-montparnasse reblogged this from chicagochi
  13. focalpointofdreams reblogged this from the-daily-feminist
  14. merry-go-roundoflife reblogged this from neutroisenjolras
  15. simplysimonmonroe reblogged this from neutroisenjolras
  16. dmstubbyfingers reblogged this from stara-light
  17. apeture-borealis reblogged this from stara-light
  18. stara-light reblogged this from 1bunnyboy3
  19. knight-0f-doom reblogged this from passionarte
  20. trancytressa reblogged this from neutroisenjolras
  21. sassywarlockprince reblogged this from neutroisenjolras
  22. the-best-i-can-afford reblogged this from passionarte
  23. 1bunnyboy3 reblogged this from neutroisenjolras

blog comments powered by Disqus
Ultralite Powered by Tumblr | Designed by:Doinwork